Where Procrastination Meets Apathy - I won't care tomorrow.

     Welcome to Tech Support Hell, ladies and gentlemen. We're working on the issue right now, so here's the skinny: the mutation of the worm virus that was supposed to lash out at Microsofts servers and crash them with packet overloads has essentially brought every internet service provider to its knees.
     Currently all services have techs and IT pros on the case trying to clean this bug out of the gears but there seems to be a bit of a problem. This worm will lash out from ANY infected system. You don't even need to have the virus to get slammed with a packet overflow. Joy of joys. you know what this means, ladies and gentlemen? If you have access, download the bloody patch NOW!
     If you don't have access... well, I'm not sure what to tell you at this point. If, for some reason, the writer of this virus is out there I have this to say:

Damn fine job. I'm dead serious. Whoever wrote this is bloody brilliant. I mean, true, it's not hard to exploit security issues in Micro$hits stuff, but still. In all honesty, I'm glad you wrote it. It shows the flaws in their network for what it is. And it shows what we SHOULD have been doing. If our main servers had been running Linux, Unix, or a Mac OS we wouldn't have been brought down like this. You've proven what happens when a monopoly focuses so strongly on the money aspect and not on providing a quality product. I am not saying this with any hint of sarcasm when I state 'congratulations.'